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After Democrats Take The L In Virginia, 3 Predictions 

Two of the largest losers’ curses have been lifted.

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Animals, 

This is a big week in American history. Two of the largest losers’ curses have been lifted. 

First, in sports, the Atlanta Braves have won the World Series and resurrected A-Town from the dumpster of professional sports. At this rate we may even see the Hawks win an NBA title by 2040. 

Secondly, the Republican Party just busted a 12-year slump in Virginia, where they haven’t won a statewide race since before Obama’s hair was gray. That’s right, the Democrats have been pitching a shutout since 2009. 

But that all ended last night when GOP underdog Glenn Youngkin notched a decisive win against former Governor Terry McAuliffe, just one year after President Biden carried the Old Dominion by 10 points. 

This turn of events has a lot of people chirping. If Democrats can lose in a D+10 state, exactly where is safe? 

It wouldn’t be America if today wasn’t reserved for partisan panic and smug gloating, but when that’s done, bank these three predictions for Virginia’s political aftermath: 

THE BIDEN PRESIDENCY IS OVER, BUT ALSO NOT OVER, AND ALSO VERY MUCH ALIVE 

President Lyndon B. Johnson famously said that, “Being president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There’s nothing to do but to stand there and take it.” 

This is pretty much what Joe Biden’s week is going to be like as the 54% of the country that disapproves of his job performance goes completely ape on how the Democratic defeat in Virginia is proof that Joe Biden is fake news. 

Biden’s critics will say a number of things that are pretty bold. But in a few weeks, they’ll find ways to un-say them. Those things will include: 

  • The Biden “Build Back Better Agenda” is officially dead in Congress 
  • Republicans are now a lock not just to re-take the House, but also the Senate too 
  • The GOP has been re-born from the Trump-lows. In Glenn Youngkin, they have the their new archetype for a non-Trump candidate (a wealthy business executive with no prior political experience lol) 

There’s a kernel of truth to all of these things, but the winds are guaranteed to change in the near future. They always do. 

Congress will continue to try to make soup from Biden’s agenda, though it may be even more watered down than before, and the GOP will still be riven with its own problems from the Trump era.  

As for the Senate, the 2022 election would be a massive outlier if the Republicans didn’t gift at least one seat to the Democrats by nominating a nutjob. 

On the short list for this year’s GOP Senate seat giveaway are Trump-endorsed candidates Hershel Walker (GA), whose ex-wife has accused him of threatening her with a gun; and Sean Parnell (PA), whose ex-wife has said he strangled her in a domestic altercation. 

So, let’s not give away the Senate just yet. There’s much left to be written in Joe Biden’s reign. 

So… like, I said, the Biden presidency is over! But not really! It’s very much alive! 

SEN. JOE MANCHIN WILL BECOME EVEN MORE POWERFUL 

One of the most refreshing things about the Biden era has been Sen. Joe Manchin’s (D-WV) emergence as the new black beast for progressives. Honestly, it was getting extremely boring to see Mitch McConnell reprise that role for the 100th consecutive season. 

We’ve talked a lot over the years about Uncle Joe – as in, Biden. 

But today we need to do talk about Uncle Ho – as in Chi Minh, the leader of communist North Vietnam during the Vietnam war. 

Yes, Sen. Joe Manchin has been pulling a classic Ho Chi Minh act on President Biden. Every time Joe Biden and Chuck Schumer think they’ve got this guerrilla warrior beat, and they get him to the negotiation table to talk peace, old Ho Chi Manchin changes the terms and heads back into the jungle to continue the fight. 

Does it matter that Manchin is outgunned and over-matched? Not one bit. Because all he has to do to win this fight– is to keep on fighting. That’s the reality of a 50-50 Senate.

Sen. Manchin has fought his party’s leadership over the size of Joe Biden’s “Build Back Better” bill and virtually every thinkable provision that could be in it. 

And as party leaders like Chuck Schumer, Pelosi, and Biden have walked closer to his vision, Manchin’s demands have basically increased from “armistice” to “unconditional surrender.”  

See this tweet here: 

Translation: it’s not me, it’s you.  

Which brings us to today – the day after an embarrassing loss for Democrats in a previously safe state. 

Now that the Democrats have gotten beat-up in Glenn Youngkin’s little Tet Offensive, Ho Chi Manchin has to be feeling emboldened to continue his insurrection. 

It’s been this pundit’s view that Joe Manchin doesn’t care one bit about Joe Biden’s “Build Back Better Plan” and will gladly watch it die.  

If that’s true, then expect his power grow. The man has no incentive to make a deal he doesn’t like. And his intra-party enemies are probably realizing that they will likely lose the war, at least in the 2022 elections. 

This is all good news for Ho Chi Manchin, who is at his best in the Democratic jungle, far from the urban centers where the bulk of his party’s power resides.  

PROMINENT MEDIA AND POLITICAL FIGURES WILL BLAME TERRY MCAULIFFE’S DEFEAT ON RACISM AND/OR CLIMATE CHANGE 

No need to wait on this one, it’s already coming true! 

Come on fam, it’s always more complicated than that. 

KEENDAWG. 

Alex “Keendawg” Keeney is a media personality whose work has been published widely. He has worked as a Congressional aide, TV writer, and marketing executive for the real Wolf of Wall Street. Follow him on Twitter @keendawg.

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Why No One Is Truly Opposed to Dumb COVID Rules

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A staffer holds up a sign to advise fans of the mandatory mask rule in the first half of an NCAA college basketball game between Tennessee and Colorado Saturday, Dec. 4, 2021, in Boulder, Colo. (AP Photo/David Zalubowski)

Animals,

Let’s face it. We all work in customer service. If you sell car insurance, you better be ready to provide speedy payment to your clients when a tree falls onto their Prius.

And if you’re a doctor who wants to keep his patients, you’d better treat them with respect. That means short waiting room times and pretending that their questions (“Does this rash mean I have cancer”) aren’t as crazy as they sound.

Then there are professionals in 100% service-based industries like marketing, law, and — GASP – government. For them, customer service is arguably the most important part of the job.

In these industries, clients don’t really understand what you do for them, so appearing to be responsive, empathetic, and on-top of things is half the job.

Which brings us to Joe Biden’s COVID speech on Thursday, where he laid out his “Winter Plan” to stop COVID’s seasonal spike that happens whenever the weather gets cold.

President Biden speaks at the National Institutes of Health, Dec. 2, 2021, in Bethesda, Md. (AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

Lurking in the background of Biden’s speech was the omicron variant, which some experts fear will bring new dangers to our shores.

The president proposed several interventions to dampen omicron and COVID’s winter spike, but if we’re being honest, his speech was really just a customer service exercise. It was President Joe Biden attempting to convince his clients – voters – that he’s responsive, empathetic, and on top of things.

As The Washington Post reported: “The president’s plan includes campaigns to increase vaccinations and booster shots, more stringent testing for international travelers and plans to make rapid at-home coronavirus testing free for more people.”

So basically… more of the same, plus an annoying COVID test if you travel internationally.

That doesn’t sound like much news at all.

(AP Photo/Alastair Grant)

By now, we know that COVID policies like mandatory masking and compulsory testing aren’t going to deliver great results, especially in an increasingly vaccinated America. Deep down, most of us probably agree that these policies are more about creating the appearance that our leaders are on top of things than actually yielding compelling public health benefits.

But is there another way for Joe Biden? Should he just sit in the White House and do nothing, as his critics in the Republican Party demand?

And would President Ron DeSantis or President Nikki Haley really act differently, if given the chance? Would they want to be on the hook personally for preventable death, even if it meant burdening Americans with dumb masking and testing rules that cut against their small government philosophy?

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (AP Photo/Chris O’Meara)

The national debate surrounding COVID boils down to risk. The president and many others believe that added COVID mandates, as onerous as they may be, are worth it because they’ll save lives. Critics see it the other way. They believe that continuing to disrupt American life is causing greater damage to the economy and the nation’s social fabric than whatever the public health benefits these mandates may hold.

Both arguments are true. And that’s why it stinks to be the president.

Joe Biden’s bully pulpit has enormous power when it comes to shaping the world’s opinion about any given issue. Unfortunately, the virus isn’t listening.

(AP Photo/Evan Vucci)

Alex “Keendawg” Keeney is a media personality whose work has been published widely. He has worked as a Congressional aide, TV writer, and marketing executive for the real Wolf of Wall Street. Follow him on Twitter @keendawg.

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Queen Nicki Leaves No Crumbs After Hosting the RHOP Reunion| The Tea

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Plus, Kanye’s Heartbreak, Celebrity Illness shockers and Jen Shah’s legal woes just got worse.

On this episode of “The Tea” Ashley, Blake and Brie dive into celebrity illness and heartbreak. To share, or not to share, that is the question. 

Keep reading and watch the episode below for fresh takes on the latest entertainment and celebrity news shot live from the Erupt studio in Hollywood.

RIP Virgil Abloh

On Sunday November 28, the fashion and entertainment community lost designer and fashion visionary Virgil Abloh.

He was the first African American artistic director at Louis Vuitton and founded the renowned culture and streetwear brand Off-White.

Abloh kept his 2-year battle with cardiac angiosarcoma, a rare cancer of the heart, hidden from most. He was 41.

“The Tea” hosts discuss Abloh’s decision to keep his diagnosis a secret like some stars including Chadwick Boseman and Robin Williams, versus stars who choose to share their battles publicly, like Selma Blair and Christina Applegate.

(AP Photo/Thibault Camus)
(Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP)

Kanye Wants His Family Back

Kanye West, who was a close friend to Virgil Abloh, took to social media over the weekend expressing his intention to bring his family back together. Saying that doing so would influence millions of other families to reconcile too.

As reported in earlier episodes of The Tea, there is speculation Ye’s estranged wife, Kim Kardashian, is currently dating comedian Pete Davidson.

Could Kimye 2.0 be in our future? The Tea hosts discuss.

(AP Photo/Rick Bowmer)

Jen Shah’s Right-Hand Man Pleads Guilty

Real Housewives of Salt Lake City star Jen Shah along with her personal assistant Stuart Smith were charged with fraud back in March.

Initially, Smith gave a not guilty plea but recently flipped his plea to guilty.

Shah still maintains her innocence.

(Bravo TV)

Nicki Hosts RHOP Reunion

Nicki Minaj took over Andy Cohen’s chair to host episode 4 of the Real Housewives of Potomac reunion and we are here for it!

Nicki didn’t hold back and asked all the questions we’ve been dying to know. On top of that, no housewife was spared. 

They all got the smoke-equally.

Could celebrity reunion hosts bring new life to the housewives’ franchise? 

The hosts discuss who we’d love to see host next.

Watch The Tea get spilled here:

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The Omicron “Scary-iant” & Football Funny Money | Political Drinking Games

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Animals,  

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year has just intersected with the most wonderful time of the week. 

By that I mean, it’s time to put a little Christmas spirit into Erupt’s political drinking games. 

On offer this week: 

  • The world has a new COVID variant. Congratulations, omicron! 
  • Twitter has a new CEO. Will he be as powerful as his predecessor, Jack Dorsey? 
  • CNN cancels Chris Cuomo (“suspends”) for using his anchorman powers to help embattled brother, Andrew 
  • The USA and EU cancel South Africa in COVID panic 
  • Trump’s top advisor sets a date with Congress to snitch on the Boss 
  • The NFL and College football continue to spend ridiculous amounts of money on truly ridiculous things.  
  • The term “Happy Holidays” gets put to rest. 

AND… A VERY SPECIAL GUEST JOINS: 

Curt Mills, contributing editor at The American Conservative and also a writer for Un-Herd. We’ll see how this silk-stocking Washington, D.C., columnist holds up in our chamber of pain.  

WATCH THIS WEEK’S POLITICAL DRINKING GAMES:

Alex “Keendawg” Keeney is a media personality whose work has been published widely. He has worked as a Congressional aide, TV writer, and marketing executive for the real Wolf of Wall Street. Follow him on Twitter @keendawg. 

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